My dad has always taken his parenting duties very seriously, and as such, he made sure that by the time I was ten years old, I had watched and rewatched all Marx Brothers movies to the point that I was able to recite the scripts word for word. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched ‘A Night at the Opera’, but it’s probably that movie and not twenty years of classical music training that means I can sing along to most of Il Trovatore. 

My mum has never been a fan of the Marx Brothers. She’d roll her eyes while we were rolling around on the floor in fits of laughter, shaking her head and muttering that she simply didn’t understand what we found so amusing.

Does this mean she doesn’t have a sense of humour? Of course not, contrary to dad’s constant suggestion of as much. Mum regularly shares killer memes and jokes that are laugh out loud hilarious. It’s just that the Marx Brothers have never made her laugh (weirdo).

This showed me that people laugh at different things. One person’s funny bone tickler is another’s shrug of utter indifference. 

One thing I learnt pretty early on when I started hanging out in the global online diabetes community is that humour is a really important coping mechanism for living with the condition. It makes sense, right? I mean, there are some pretty grim aspects of life with T1D, and having a laugh can lighten especially dark days, and help us keep perspective when things feel overwhelming.

Back in the OG DOC days, there were awards given to writers and people on social media, and one of the award categories was humour. I’ve tried to inject some humour into this blog over the years – you can be the judge how successful I’ve been. Read to the end and you’ll see I’ve linked to some posts where I tried to use jokes and humour to keep things a little lighter. 

Sometimes, however, attempts at humour don’t land all that well. Or they land at the expense of others. And when that’s the case, I think we need to stop for a minute and check ourselves. Is it worth getting a laugh when you are punching down?

I don’t think so – especially because the result of punching down is often stigma. And we all know how I feel about that. Right? RIGHT?

None of this is new from me. I’ve been talking about how when people stigmatise any type of diabetes, we all suffer. I’ve been pretty blunt when calling out the T1D community for being outright nasty about people with other types of diabetes, especially people with T2D. The stigma we experience is a direct result of misinformation and ignorance about all types of diabetes. Contributing to it is not only nasty, but it is also voting against our own interests. 

This post today has come about because over the last 24-hours a T1D Facebook group that I’m a member of has been embroiled in a fiery debate because one of the group’s moderators posted a meme that stigmatises type 2 diabetes. I’m not sharing the meme here, (because why would I add to diabetes stigma?) but I can describe it by saying that it highlighted a risk factor of T2D in a very stigmatising way. It was unoriginal, unamusing and unkind. 

And it got messy. A number of people asked for the meme to be removed. Many were upset and found it offensive. 

The moderators of the group doubled down. There were demands to scroll by and reminders that we were not there to ‘defend’ other types of diabetes. Comments pleading for the post to be removed were deleted and people were told they ‘Can’t take a joke’. I asked a few times for someone to please explain the ‘joke’, because I didn’t understand it. No one was able to do that. My comments were deleted anyway. 

It astonishes me that the moderators of this group have chosen the hill they want to die on to be that it’s okay to stigmatise T2D and people should get over it if they don’t like it. They must have spent hours deleting comments and telling people to ‘get over themselves’. They repeatedly pointed out that the group is a T1D meme group with what seems an assumption that all people with T1D are happy for there to be nasty memes about T2D. Reassuringly, that’s not the case. A lot of people with T1D in the group are not impressed about the stigmatising posts and pop their heads above the parapet to let that be known. 

A T1D meme page could be a source of joy, amusement, unity and some pretty clever humour, but instead, this group seems to regularly descend into bickering about what’s a joke and what’s just plain cruel, because many people with T1D don’t want to see T2D stigmatised or for misconceptions to be perpetuated. I’m one of those people. 

And yes, I know that I can just leave the group. But one of the other things my dad, (and mum) taught me is that the standard you walk by is the standard you accept, and posting crappy, stigmatising, false and outright mean things about people with any type of diabetes is not a standard I accept. I call it out – regardless of who it is posting it. 

I also want people to understand that these sorts of posts contribute to not just stigma about T2D, but to stigma about T1D as well. It constantly befuddles me that people who defend the right to be nasty and stigmatising about T2D are the same people who are up in arms when someone says something incorrect or stigmatising about T1D. The intellectual disconnect that can’t join the dots between the two issues is really something!

We can do better as a community. There are brilliant stories, jokes, and moments of wit that are truly hilarious, and we should be able to laugh about the shared absurdities and frustrations of life with T1D. But we can do it without throwing another group of people under the bus. 

I laughed way more than I should have at this T1D meme.

Want to see some truly funny things?

Watch Melissa Lee’s D-Parodies. Truly brilliant and hilarious.

Spoonful of Laughter from the team at dStigmatise brings comedians together to show how we can laugh about diabetes, and check stigma at the door. 

Sam Morrison is one of the featured comedians on A Spoonful of Laughter and you can follow him, here.

Follow Brad Slaight! He’s hilarious.

Miss Diabetes manages to address some pretty serious issues around diabetes using her fabulous comics and artwork.

His Instagram handle is @type1comedian, and he’s damn funny! I’m not sure if any of Chelcie Rice’s stand up is online, but search for it and see if you get lucky.

And some questionable attempts of humour from me

Pancreas performance review (it’s really all about Effin’ Birds!)

My Lie on a Plate (rubbish influencers influencing rubbish)

Are you a diabetes expert? (This quiz has the answer!)