Dear Pancreas

For the last twenty-one years, part of you has been living rent free in my body doing…well…doing bloody nothing.

If I could performance manage you out of there, I would. Alas, I cannot. But here is the performance review I would give and the things I would like to say (with illustrations from Effin’ Birds).

As it stands, it’s been a while since the whole functioning beta cell thing happened.

In fact:

And…

Just an idea, but…

I’d really like to know…

And was wondering if you could perhaps…

But…if the last twenty-one years is anything to go by, I’m guessing that not much is going to change any time soon.

So, we’ll just keep going with this?

Yep?

Here’s the thing: the last twenty-one years have been pretty rough at times. But I’ve managed. I have no idea what I am doing most of the time, and spend a lot of time with a confused look on my face, or saying…

But that’s okay. Because along with the understanding and acceptance that I may never, ever truly be good at diabetes, it turns out that I am managing.

So, dear pancreas. As you were.

And on I’ll go. As I have been. Just like this…

Effin’ Birds is the sweary joy you need in your life. After I found them last year, I wrote this piece because, I found that there is a picture for pretty much every diabetes moment imaginable. 

Follow them on Insta here and Twitter here. (Obviously, this is not for people who are offended by obscene language. I am not one of those people. Neither is my kid who takes great delight in bringing out our set of Effin’ Birds playing cards whenever she has friends over. I apologise unreservedly to those friends’ parents.)