We have a beautiful tree over the back laneway at our place. Usually at this time of the year, it is in full autumn brilliance. The red and gold leaves catch the gorgeous afternoon sunlight, and where the leaves have already littered to the ground, the branches are bare.

But this year, things have been a little different. Our tree brought out its autumn clothes a much later than usual, but sure enough a couple of weeks ago, we noticed that the leaves were beginning to turn. Every day, I’d look over the fence to see a deeper red, a more golden glow. Sure, we hadn’t needed to turn the heating on inside the house yet, and my really warm knits were still tucked away in the cupboard, but the tree was promising winter and cooler days.

Blossom buds. In May…

Over the weekend, as I sat in the kitchen, the back door open letting in a lovely breeze, I looked up at our tree. And there, on the bare branches, I could see something shooting. I went outside to have a closer look and realised that what I could see was the start of the blossom that comes out in the middle of springtime.

Our poor tree was looking mighty confused. I was confused. This isn’t how things go. The seasons are meant to be somewhat regulated and ordered.  I like order. Order makes sense. This didn’t make sense at all to my brain, which likes things to be as they should be!

This wasn’t the only confusion I dealt with this week. Last Friday, I spoke about DIY diabetes technology at a health professional event and there was a lot of confusion.

I only had ten minutes (seriously not long enough to talk about something that is a completely novel concept to most of the audience), so I spoke fast, waved my hands around faster and tried to simplify the whole idea of looping into about 8 slides. ‘Renza will be around afterwards if you have questions,’ the emcee announced to the audience who all looked slightly bamboozled and winded after I finished.

There were questions. Lots of them about how Loop works, what it really is and who can use it.

But the one thing that seems to garner the most confusion is the cost. ‘You didn’t say how much has cost you,’ a few people said to me once the event was finished. Actually, I did. (Admittedly, very quickly, because: 10 minutes!) ‘Well, you need to source a pump that works, so that may be costly. And if the person using it is over 21, they will need to fund CGM themselves. Plus, the Riley Link is about $150 and there is a cost associated with becoming an Apple developer,’ I repeated what I’d said in my talk. (Obviously, I was talking Loop, but there was an OpenAPS user in the room too and I think he may have answered a couple of questions about the cost of his set up.) ‘No, no…what about the actual cost to use the app? How much does that cost?’

I have had this question asked probably more than any other. For some reason, people don’t seem to understand the concept of open source information sharing. No one is making money through this. The clever people who have developed DIY diabetes solutions place the details online for anyone to see and use. For free.

But this seems to be a confusing concept for a number of people.‘Wait. So no one is making in money from this? What about the people who worked it out in the first place? They are. Right?’ 

‘Nope,’I always reply, wondering how many ways I need to say it (along with wondering why I am so lousy at communicating things and also, if my hands waving around are distracting people).

Inevitably, the next comment is ‘Well, I’m not sure why someone doesn’t try to commercialise it. That would get it through regulations, wouldn’t it?’

At that point, it’s my turn to look confused. Why is it so difficult for people to understand that there are actually people in the world who genuinely want to do something good for others? Or that the WHOLE point of the #WeAreNotWaiting ‘movement’ is the fact that there is no waiting for regulations that are inevitable with commercialisation?

I guess that unless you are part of this community, it could be difficult to understand. But the generosity of those in the community is on show all the time. Whether that be the people doing the grunt work behind the scenes to make the dreams of DIY diabetes a reality, or the people who are then writing the step by step instructions so even fools such as me can follow those instructions, or the incredible community members who are ready to jump in any time to answer SOS calls for help when something doesn’t seem to be working, these people are doing it all for nothing more than the gratitude of those of us who are reaping the rewards of their cleverness and kindness.

The confusion – and disbelief – about this community is confusing to me, because every day I see how incredible it is. I only wish I was smart enough to give back even a fraction of what I have received from those brilliant folks who are there for the rest of us. And I really wish I was able to do a better job explaining what a marvellous bunch of people they are!