Last week, I tweeted/Instagrammed/Facebooked this:


Because it is the best cartoon ever. Ever. Ever.

My iPhone could, in some ways, be considered my primary-care physician. It has the ability to manage everything about my diabetes. All in one little hand-held device with a cute Kate Spade cover.

It has the contact details of my real-life (i.e. non-iOS) healthcare team. I don’t even need to dial – I just have to ask Siri to connect me! And she does. Or else she connects me to the Japanese restaurant from where we frequently get Friday night takeaway. Either is good.

It has apps that can do all sorts of things – produce pretty graphs, tell me the time of day that my BGL is the highest (and therefore showing the time of day that I am most likely to have eaten doughnuts) and remind me that I’ve been doing hardly any BGL checks. Judgemental little thing.

It keeps appointment times and, if I was the organised type, could remind me when I need to fill a prescription or am overdue for something. (Note to self: book in pap smear.)

It has all my different social media platforms, easily accessible, so that I can see what is going on with everyone I have ever known and not known, see photos of what people are eating, and get links to videos of dogs and cats being cute. Which make me smile and feel happy which is good for my mental health.

It connects me to people with diabetes at all times of the day. It’s a 24 hour, 7 day a week, 365 day a year peer support group full of people who are able to provide reassurance, humour and love. And teach me to swear at high or low BGLs in all the languages of the world!

It contains vital information including my pump basal rates. Which is good because I am sure that information will come in handy one day.

Dr Google lives in there and she is able to give me information about pretty much anything whenever I like. For example, at 3am when I wake up with a headache and need a diagnosis of the likelihood of some sort of tumour.

Everything I need. Doctor, counsellor, friend and comic. No wonder I start hyperventilating when it’s not in sight!

Consultation time